Alan remembers having trouble controlling his feelings throughout childhood, but there was one moment in the fifth grade in which nerves got the better of him; he couldn’t read words of a play aloud. It lead to him being teased and growing angry. From that point forward, he would vow to never speak in front of crowd. But Alan knows now that much of that uncontrollable anger came from the influence of his father, who he know refers to as a “rage-a-holic” who often left Alan scared to express himself at home. A suicide attempt in early adulthood convinced Alan to seek help.
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